Deep doubts

Ooooh. I’m confused. I’m not drawing. I should, but i’m not.  All my passion and concentration is focused on a course i’m following that talks about Sci-Fi. I guess that i’m starting to understand NOW a dream i had … when i was 16.

So… a dream old 11 years.

But does a dream exist? it’s not made of material stuff.
So if i say my dream is 11 year old, i’m pretty sure i’m doing a mistake.

Perhaps mind can see in a deeper way. And i get lost in all these thoughts.

The dream itself is quite simple. I’m in a house, a simple room actually. There’s a bed with whites sheets. And a night table. I’m laying down in this bed. There’s a window above it. I know… i shouldn’t… look outside the window. It’s forbidden. But I’m definitely too curious. I spy outside the window. There’s an old man. Sitted on his knees. In front of him, there’s an ancient little table with a cup of tea on it. I wonder “the room i’m in is occidental… I’m in the present day… but outside… Outside is old. Oriental. Very very ancient. ” The old man seem to be blind. I feel he can’t see me. So I continue my spying. But immediately he turns his head and looks at me. “I can see you.” He says. “Oh, I’m so sorry” I feel guilty, dirty. “I’m so sorry… what can I do to be forgiven?” I asked, desperate. “Write it down” he said. I stand up and see the’s ink and paper on the night table. “What should I write” I asked to myself while I grab the paper and the ink. I start running, I open the door of the room, and here I am, in the ancient world. “What should I write?!?!” I scream, but the old man, with his long white hair disappeared. There were 3 black dog barking at me. They were defending a door made of stone I couldn’t see from the house. And I woke up.

I always thought this was my animus, talking about Jung’s considerations of the anima/animus.

I need more light into my mind. I’m so confused.

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